Growing up an only child (to some degree), I always
wondered what it would be like to have a sibling, older, younger, any that
would care to stick around at home and be close to the family. I dreamed of
sharing moments with an older sibling, them giving me wise advice of the
challenges that would lie ahead, and me working to make them happy and sharing
our love for each other. When I mentioned this to my friends who had siblings,
they'd mention that I was lucky to be an only child, claiming that it wasn't an
easy life having a sibling. For years I'd wondered what they'd really meant. I
thought to myself, surely it can't be that bad... but then I was wrong.
Although it is a fictional story, "The Water that
Falls on You From Nowhere" demonstrates some of the immense difficulties
of having an older sibling that I hadn't seen before. Michelle, the narrator
(Matt)'s sister, works to excel in every way possible, working to be the 'good
child' in the family. Her mother claims that she does things for her brother
out of love and goodness, but it just doesn't seem that way. For years, Matt
has been subjected to her cruelty, even convinced that if he didn't do as she
said, he would live a terrible life and die.
Her position as an impediment towards her brother becomes
more evident as the Pei family gathers for Christmas at Michele's home. Matt,
bringing over Gus, his fiancé, with him, is immediately taken aside by his
sister, accusing Matt of trying to kill their parents. For the remainder of his
time there, she prevents him from being alone with either of their parents,
going to far extremes to do so. She makes it a point to remind him not to come out
to their parents, almost forbidding it. She tries to convince Matt that Gus,
despite loving Matt, would likely leave him for another, and generally putting
depressing thoughts into Matt's mind. Despite her attempts, Matt tells the
family during dinner after being left in a tight spot. Immediately, Michele
kicks him out of the home, telling him to never return. And so, Matt obliges,
but not before his mother lets him know that she accepts his marriage.
Matt reminds himself that his mother feels that her sister
does what she does out of love. Perhaps she felt as though their parents would
not accept the marriage or his sexuality and wanted to protect him, but with
the way she'd grown up treating him... makes it seem as though perhaps she just
didn't want him to live as himself. She constantly tells him to find a good
Chinese girl and get married and have grandchildren, claiming that it's so he
can continue the bloodline, but... could there also have been ulterior motives
with that statement?
Hey Angie, I really liked the question you posed at the end of your blog post - and I think you answered it one way when you said that Michele may not want Matt to "live as himself." I definitely don't think she accepts him for who he is, and likely doesn't see the pain it causes him to have family who detest a part of his identity. I can't imagine what it would be like to live with a sister like Michele. I have an older brother, but we've never come to crossroads like Michele and Matt have, so no, having an older sibling isn't all bad ;)
ReplyDeleteI think having an accepting family is a huge blessing, one that many of us take for granted. Stories like Matt's are all too common in the world outside of science fiction and literature. That's what makes Chu's story so poignant, too, for the lie-detecting water eventually brings Matt closure in the end.
Jenn
What ulterior motive could the sister have had? She's just generally emotionally abusive from the sounds of it, and for no adequately-explained reason. Sure, you could say that "she has his best interests at heart!", but I can't think of any reasonable explanation for "YOU SENT MOM FLOWERS FLOWERS CAN DIE HOW DARE YOU". Like, the rest of his family seems chill (especially mom, mom is super cool), but what the hell, Michele?
ReplyDelete- Cam (blogspot confuses me)